What does a “normal” sex life look like in the United Kingdom?

There’s no equality in the bedroom yet, and almost 60% of all Britons in a relationship want more sex with their partner. 

This is shown by our large international research study about sex, intimacy and relationships; Sindex by Sinful gives us an inside look at British orgasm statistics.

We’ll take a closer look at how often we have sex, who fakes an orgasm, and the orgasm gap between men and women.,

A normal sex life does not exist

Sindex by Sinful shows that 78% of British men achieve orgasm every time or often when they have sex with another, but the same only applies to 58% of women.

This uneven distribution is known as the “orgasm gap”, and it can have a negative impact on British bedrooms. 

Our research also shows that 4% have sex one or more times a day, but 16% haven’t had sex since last year. However, the majority of brits have sex 1-2 times per week. That statistic takes up a whopping 25%. 

So there’s a really big variation in both the number of orgasms, as well as, the frequency of the sex had in British bedrooms. 

“The stats illustrate the fact there is no recipe for a correct or normal sex life. There’s a big difference in how often we want or have the opportunity to have sex, and there is an equally big difference in what sex should include and why we have it. Both when having it with ourselves or a partner,” says Ditte Jensen, Sexual Wellness Specialist at Sinful.

The hunt for climax

If we dive into the numbers from Sindex by Sinful again, we can find out how many British men and women have faked an orgasm. 

It turns out a whopping 68% of women and 22% of men. But why do we fake the climax that many have sex to achieve?

“There can be many reasons why women, in particular, fake their orgasms. The most common ones are that we feel it simply takes too long, and we want to acknowledge our partners' determined stimulation. It can also be a way to finish sex when you’re not as turned on as you’d like, or maybe there’s a list of chores that need tending before you can call it a day,” says Ditte Jensen, who now turns her attention to men: 

“It’s surprising to find that 22% of men have faked an orgasm. But I think some men succumb to the pressure or societal expectation that men should always come - and faster than women. But that’s just not always the reality.”

Is there a connection? 

If we shift the focus back to the orgasm gap, it’s natural to wonder whether or not all these fake orgasms play a role in this unequal distribution. At least, that’s what Ditte Jensen thinks. 

“The more we fake orgasms, the more we mislead our partners - we have to take responsibility for our own pleasure. The better you know yourself and your body, the easier it becomes to show and tell your partner what you like and how you achieve orgasm,”  she says. 

However, Ditte wishes that we’d focus less on orgasm as the goal when we have sex. She believes there’s so much more pleasure found in sex than just the orgasm. And it can be difficult to be in the moment if that’s the only goal you have in mind.

She’s also pleased to read the reasons why the Brits stop faking orgasms: 

• They’ve started to tell their sex partner what they liked: 30%
• Their partner began to pay more attention to their desires and preferences: 30%
• They’ve become more comfortable with not having an orgasm: 22%
• They started to feel more confident: 21%
• They started to explore how they could get an orgasm on their own: 21%

“It’s simply a wonderful read. I can only applaud that we’ve become more aware of ourselves and our partners and talk more about the sex we enjoy together. We KNOW that communication is the way to a better sex life,” Ditte Jensen says in reference to the first part of our survey.Psst! Do you need a fun, different and loving way to start the conversation? We’ve developed Let's Talk About Sex – The Game, a card game containing 52 questions about intimacy and sex.

About the study: Sindex by Sinful

Sindex by Sinful is based on an international survey conducted by Cint on behalf of Sinful, as well as on sales data from Sinful. The population survey was conducted in Denmark, Sweden, Norway, Finland, France and the United Kingdom with 2,000 respondents from each country.

The data was collected from 17 May to 8 June, 2022.

Read more at Sindex by Sinful, where we will reveal new, exciting results from the survey every three months (until 2023).