A Beginner’s Guide to Great Sex

Let’s be real — sex isn’t just something you do, it’s something you experience.

Whether you’re dreaming about romantic sex, wondering how to have sex for the first time, or just looking for the best sex tips to shake things up, you’ve come to the right place.

And you’re definitely not alone!

According to Sindex by Sinful, our nationwide survey on sex and relationships, 85% of Britons say a good sex life is important, 52% would love to experiment more, and 59% admit they dream of having more sex with their partner.

This guide will help you explore everything from how to increase sex drive to how to spice up your sex life — plus a few fun facts you might never have thought to ask, like how many calories you burn during sex or how often couples actually do it.

What Is Sex?

Spoiler: It’s more than just penetration!

Sex can be anything that gives you and your partner(s) sexual pleasure — penetrative sex (vaginal or anal), oral sex, mutual masturbation, sensual massages, or even non-penetrative play like teasing and slow kisses.

So when people ask: What does sex look like? The answer is simple: It looks like whatever you want it to.

Whether you’re all about fast and fiery passion or lingering, slow sex, what matters the most is that it should always be consensual, safe, and of course...feel good!

Why Is Sex Important?

Okay, let’s break it down. The good stuff?

• It brings you closer as a couple
• It reduces stress
• It improves sleep
• It boosts your immune system
• And yes, you can burn 100–300 calories per session (depending on how athletic you get)

But here’s the catch: rushing into first time sex without communication or skipping information about how to have safe sex can lead to disappointment, discomfort, or even health risks. And while frequency matters less than satisfaction, mismatched desires can leave people wondering how often couples have sex and worrying if they’re “normal” (spoiler: there’s no such thing as normal).

How to Have Sex: A Step-by-Step Guide for Beginners and Beyond

Step 1: Communicate First Talk about what you both want. What turns you on? What’s off-limits? Consent is sexy, and clear communication builds trust and deepens intimacy.

Step 2: Set the Mood Romantic sex thrives on atmosphere — soft lighting, music, sexy lingerie, candles, massage oil… you get the idea.

Step 3: Slow Down and Enjoy Foreplay Foreplay isn’t optional — it’s essential! Building anticipation makes everything better, whether you’re into slow, teasing touches or playful nibbles.

Step 4: Stay Safe Wondering how to have safe sex? Condoms, dental dams, and lube are your best friends. We stock everything you need to keep things hot and healthy.

Step 5: Explore All Kinds of Sex Penetrative sex is just one option. Non-penetrative sex, like oral play or mutual touching, can deliver just as much pleasure (sometimes even more!).

Step 6: Aftercare Is Everything Afterwards, cuddle, talk, or just lie in each other’s arms. Emotional connection deepens sexual satisfaction — don’t skip it!

7 Tips and Tricks to Make Sex More Fun

Here are seven playful tips to spice up your sex life (and yes, we recommend trying them all!):

1. Try Something New

Whether it’s an erotic game, a blindfold, or a couple’s toy, a little novelty goes a long way. Trying something new together not only boosts excitement but also strengthens your connection and keeps the spark alive.

2. Experiment with Slow Sex

Want to know what passionate sex is like? Focus on each sensation, every kiss, every breath — drag it out and make it count. When you slow things down, you build tension and anticipation, turning even the smallest touches into something electric and unforgettable.

3. Talk About Fantasies

Share what you secretly dream about — even the little things you’ve never dared to say out loud. It’s a huge turn-on to open up, and you might be surprised at how many new possibilities (and shared desires!) you discover together. Whether it’s trying a new position, playing with a fantasy scenario, or simply expressing what excites you, talking about fantasies builds trust, excitement, and a sense of adventure in your sex life.

4. Boost Your Libido Naturally

Wondering how to increase your sex drive? Focus on feeling good in your body: get enough rest, move in ways that make you feel alive, and build emotional closeness with your partner. And remember, sometimes simply adding more fun and curiosity to your sex life is the best turn-on of all!

5. Schedule a Sexy Date Night

Yes, really! Planning sex doesn’t make it boring — it builds anticipation. Leave a cheeky note or send a naughty text to tease throughout the day. You'll be surprised how well it works!

6. Stop Focusing on Performance

Instead of stressing over how to make sex last longer, enjoy what’s happening now. You can always explore cock rings or delay products if you want.

7. Celebrate Every Win

Tried a new sex toy? Had a steamy quickie? Celebrate it! Whether it’s a shared laugh, a high-five, or a cosy cuddle, marking these little wins fills your sex life with positive energy — and that’s what encourages even more adventure, connection, and fun together.

Sinful Recommends

If you’re just starting out on your sexual journey, the world of products can feel a little overwhelming — but don’t worry, we have you covered.

We’ve picked out three simple, fun, and beginner-friendly essentials to help you explore romantic and passionate sex with comfort and confidence. These items are perfect whether you’re flying solo or spicing things up with a partner.

Here’s where we suggest you start:

1. A quality water-based lubricant

Glide into pleasure! A good lube makes everything smoother, gentler, and far more enjoyable — especially when you’re new to sex or trying something for the first time. Water-based lubes are safe to use with both condoms and sex toys, and they’re easy to clean up afterwards. You can also check all our essentials right here.

2. Premium condoms

Safe sex = worry-free fun. Condoms not only protect against STIs and unwanted pregnancies, but they can also add extra sensation or texture if you want to experiment. We offer a wide range of sizes and styles so you can find what feels just right for you.

3. Sex Toy Starter Kit

Ready to play? The Sinful Sex Toy Starter Kit is a fantastic introduction to the world of toys, offering a playful mix of vibes and sensations in one beginner-friendly box. Want to open up the conversation even more? The Sinful Let’s Talk About Sex Game is perfect for couples looking to laugh, explore fantasies, and connect on a whole new level — all in a fun, light-hearted way.

With these three essentials, you’re all set to explore, experiment, and enjoy every delicious moment. We are here to guide, inspire, and make sure you’re having a fabulous time along the way.

FAQ: Quick Answers to Your Burning Questions

Let us answer all the questions you may have.

What does sex feel like?

It’s different for everyone — it can be soft, intense, playful, emotional, or all of the above. The key is to stay present and enjoy the ride.

How often do couples have sex?

According to our survey, Sindex by Sinful, the average couple has sex 1–2 times a week. But honestly? Don’t get too hung up on the numbers. What matters most is finding a rhythm that works for you and your partner — satisfaction and connection are way more important than hitting some weekly quota.

How to make sex last longer?

Practice slower movements, take breaks (aka edging), or explore our range of delay products and thicker condoms designed for prolonging pleasure.

How many calories are burned during sex?

Roughly 100–300, depending on intensity. So yes, it absolutely counts as exercise!

Where can I read Sinful’s big sex survey?

You can dive into Sindex by Sinful right here to see what Brits really think about sex, desire, fantasies, and relationships.

Ready to Play?

Sex should be playful, intimate, exciting — and most of all, fun. Whether you’re learning how to have sex for the first time, bringing new passion into a long-term relationship, or just looking for the best sex tips, we are here to help you every step of the way.

So light those candles, turn up the music, and let’s make your next session unforgettable.